Sunday, October 12, 2014
I thank God over and over for my wonderful life. Yes, it took a long time and the road to get here was impossibly hard But I kept on moving forward. Sometimes the efforts and mistakes hurt so bad, and I was utterly alone. No family at my side. I had purposely kept my blood family away because they were not supportive in my struggles to do better. It was just reprimands and constant reminders of all my mistakes. Never a hug, or I am here for you, or let's figure this out together. No. It was hard for me to try to change horrible habits instilled in me from a shitty unloving childhood. But I did and constant pointing to my past just didn't help. What did help? Friends. Friends that over the years stayed by my side every step of the way. Who picked me up when I was so down. Who shared the bad and now the good times of my life. These few souls are my real family. Those bleak days are now behind me. I have learned so much on how to over come and my life has been charmed beyond my own dreams. I thank God for my friends who were always there; for now we live and laugh and have each other to enjoy these good days. I can't begin to explain my daily positive life of adventures. I like it this way. That is why I have no use for the negative nellies to point out my shortcomings of over 25 years ago. That's the past. I have forgiven myself. I have a lot of love in my soul, but only for my friends who truly love me with no strings, expectations or rules.